5 days

its been a week. and i can say i am doing ok. but heck, i've been better.

we still talk here and there. its weird though. i dont know if i can still talk to him. i asked him and he said he felt the same way. its like i've lost my rights to know whats going on in his life.

but we both are still alive and well. no worries.

its weird now cos whenever he calls me. i have absolutely no idea what he was going to say. and i get so nervous, its like the beginning all over again.

but sometimes its hard cos i have so much i want to say but i cant.

we worked together yesterday, everything was fine. but then reality hit me that we are only friends. now, he doesnt wait for me. he doesnt look my way. dont know if he is trying so hard to avoid me. or that it is hard for him to be around me.

i tell myself, dont think about it. sometimes the heart doesnt listen to the brain.

oh well, i am watching this movie he promised to take me to since october, but they kept postponing the date till late december. and we never got to watch it. i lost my movie buddy, so i have to watch them online now.